Don’t Mess With Ed

Spotted: Martina, Minneapolis, MN  

Name: Edith (goes by Ed) 

Age: 89

Place of origin: Belgium 

Life story: Ed is super smart. Genius level smart. Finished elementary through high school in 5 years. She felt like the education system was not fulfilling enough, so she started traveling around looking for something to excite her. She was in the circus for 2.25 years, was a shoe maker, conned her way into being an astro physics teacher at age 19 (taught Frank Abagnale, Jr. and inspired his cons).

Ed now runs a global school system to teach people how to follow their dreams through cons, just like she did. However, she mysteriously goes away for weeks at a time, never telling people where she went or why. Her house is full of interesting items (sculptures, paintings, etc) but she never says where or how she got them. She never married or had any kids. Has does have a best friend though, Sal. Sal was married and had kids but sadly his wife died. Now, Sal and Ed live together. Sal doesn’t know about Ed’s secret business but he suspects something. He understands not to ask.

Everyone thinks Ed and Sal are together romantically but it is simply platonic. Sals family has taken Ed in and she is an honorary grandmother (is called grandma Ed). One day, Becca (age 16), Sals granddaughter, was staying at Ed and Sals house and needed a stapler. She wandered into Ed’s office and found all her secret documents about her international business. Becca wanted to join the school, but Ed wouldn’t let her. Although Becca doesn’t have Ed’s genius, she has better charisma and street smarts. Ed is so grateful to Sal’s family for accepting her and loving her that she doesn’t want to bring any of them into her business so she denied Becca’s entrance. Becca is very upset about this (will eventually make a rival global con business). Becca is not photographed here. No one has any photographs of Becca (just how she likes it). Everywhere Ed goes, she leaves an object that doesn’t belong (coke bottle seen above).